Seeing Improvement..Still questioning myself!

So Noel is continuing to do well. The swelling on her belly is improving and the redness is also starting to go away. The incision still looks clean. She is still moving about and seems happy. She has pooped twice! She is trying to jump on me and give me her front paw like she always has, too! I try to stop her from doing this just yet..at least until she heals. She wags her tail and gets up to see Dad when he comes in. I have been sleeping next to her in my bed and Dad is sleeping with our son. He is not thrilled about that. I just feel bad because she is in her crate a large portion of the day because I can’t have her out with the children all here. Plus, my daycare is in my basement and I cannot carry Noel up and down the steps to go outside to use the bathroom. So she stays upstairs by herself all day..so I don’t want her to be alone at night too!

Question..the vet said give her the pain medication if she is in pain. Well, I mean obviously if she is whimpering or whining she is in pain. Noel is pretty tough..she has not whined but once, which is when she was having trouble adjusting her position. So how do you know if your dog is in pain?? They cannot tell us! I just think if we had something amputated with the wound still so fresh there would be pain, right? I have been giving her the pain medication as much as she can get it for now. Is that wrong to do so? I started stretching the time between doses out a bit today. My view is, the medicine is not hurting her stomach because she is eating, drinking and now pooping just fine. So it seems like if I can ease any pain while her wound heals than that would be the nice thing to do. I would do that for a person..right?

So..on to my regrets..questions..She is doing wonderful..again considering. But, I need to emphasize the activity my Noel endured on a daily basis. Every waking moment was energy and go go go go…to the point that I was pulling my hair out some days to manage her and all the children I watch. My poor kids were about to grow up not knowing what a ball was because she couldn’t let them touch a ball. She popped every one or had to play fetch. No soccer for the kids..its Noel’s ball. So it breaks my heart to think I have taken that from her. I think what if it would have been better to avoid the surgery and let her live a shorter life the way she enjoyed living it. Then I think what if the cancer is in her body somewhere and she ends up getting sick and dying in the near future anyway…now I made her last months or year on 3 legs when it could have been on 4! Obviously, there is absolutely nothing I can do about it now. But if I knew before surgery that she would only have a year I don’t think I would do it..but if they said she will live another 5 years or so it does seem worth it. There was no easy way to know that though. It is hard because Noel’s activity was completely unaffected by the tumor. It was about the size of a golf ball on her front paw, but you would never know it. She didn’t know it.

I know I just need to accept that I was trying to help her and this is how the situation has ended for now. I also tell myself she will be digging holes with one front leg because that is the kind of dog she is. Even though I really hate it when she digs holes all over my yard! : )

5 thoughts on “Seeing Improvement..Still questioning myself!”

  1. Sounds like Noel is doing GREAT! Why do you think Noel won’t be a ball hawk again? Once she is healed and the sutures are out she will be back at it I bet.
    And don’t forget- that tumor would have eventually ulcerated creating a wound that would be very painful and might not ever heal.
    I was right there with you questioning my decision to do surgery. Mag had no pain before and was really unhappy after, I really thought I screwed up. Then they told me 6 to 9 months survival, and I was sure I screwed up! But like I said in an earlier post, we are giving (or gave) our girls a chance. Maggie taught me not to worry about how much time we might have left, but to focus on the time we have now. It was a hard lesson for me to learn, it took me a while to figure it out, but it has served me well!
    On the pain meds, Mag was on tram for about two weeks. If Noel is tolerating it OK I would keep her on for at least a week, then maybe try tapering off. My quad pug is quite stoic, but he sits and fidgets a little when he is in pain, sometimes he pants when he is not warm.
    Noel is doing really well! And once those sutures are out I. Et she will master the stairs too.

    Karen

  2. Something tells me that the next time she digs a hole, you’re going to cheer her on! Cancer has a funny way of helping us cherish every moment and make the most out of our time together. It’s an awful disease but it brings to light the fact that with or without cancer, nobody can predict our future. Everyone is different, everyone will walk a different path. The best anyone can do is follow their heart and stay as happy as you would as if you knew you were living your last day on earth. Noel is pretty good at that, follow her lead and you’ll feel more confident in your decision to amputate.

    As for pain signals, this article may help:
    http://tripawds.com/forums/tips-and-resources/how-to-know-if-your-dog-is-in-pain/

  3. We kept Cody on pain meds for the first two weeks. After the first we did start to ween him off of them slowly.. we were so afraid that he would be in pain. Our surgeon told us that we could stop after 5 days… but we just didn’t like that idea. So go with your gut… keep her comfortable.

    I know that all of this is so overwhelming and right now it seems like her energy may never come back.. but it will! The first two-three weeks are so hard. Cody really didn’t get back in action till week 4 but now he runs everywhere and wrestles with his brother just like they did before! His walks aren’t quite as long.. but he plays outside just like he did and he is so happy. And getting that tumor away was really a good decision. It is SO hard I know. I worry all the time about how much time Cody has left. Unlike Noel Cody was in pain from his tumor.. he limped all the time.

    Keep your head up and know you did all of this for Noel and did it out of love. She will get her spunk back don’t worry! 🙂

    Cody and Family

  4. For three weeks I questioned my decision and felt like I jad made a horrible one.

    But omce recovery did take place and her sparkle came back bigger and brighter than evee, I knew I had done this FOR my dog and not TO my dog!

    These first few weeks are the hardest. On top of that, you are exhausted.

    And yese, I think pretty uch everyone here ketp their dogs on pain meds for two weeks. It’s much better to keep it in their system consisten tly, rather than trying to “catch up” to the pain once it has started. So I “assume” the vet has her on a steady dose every “x” number of hours?

    And I can proise you this…whether Noel runs a marathong or becomes a couch potato…her REAL happiness comes from being byyour side,gettinb tummy rubs, ear scratches, treats and being told what a good girl she is!!

    She’s had major surgery, is adapting to three legs and is soooooo early in the recovery. She’s ot focusing on so ething being “taken away”, she’s just lapping up all the love. Her energy will return…maybe she only pops two balls instead of three…she’s happy. So ry not and project past the moment…she’s not. She will be happy n so many levels…new ways…old ways…she’ll be happy!

    Se ding you love!

    Sally and Happy Hannah

  5. Thanks again all…these comments are so helpful and uplifting. and jerry…i think i will be cheering her on the next time she digs a hole! haha

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